Beautiful pieces of broken glass
von
Birdy
1
Tears are runnig down my cheek, as I’m trying to gather the pieces of broken glass off the floor. The snow globe had stood there on my bookshelf right next the yearbook of 2002 for six years no, ever since I unwrapped it from all those cloths that had kept it from breaking on the long long flight back to Germany. Back then I had placed it there, so I could be able to look at it, whenever I sat at my desk or lay in my bed.
A beautiful snow globe it was….two teenagers, a boy and a girl, both wrapped in heavy winter-coats, scarves and gloves. Her right Hand tightly held inside his one, while her other hand reaches for the falling snowflakes. He is laughing and leans against a snow-covered hollytree, as snow keeps falling.
The day, you gave it to me was a quite gloomy one, as it was the day I left you for good – we both were aware of this fact.
“There won’t ever be a winter’s day, that I will not remember you looking so pretty underneath your red coat and behind this cuddly scarve of yours!”, you said.
The little scene inside the snow globe was like a snap-shot of the days we lived to see during the time we were so much pinched for. We both knew, that the road we walked together ended right here, since it just wasn’t meant for us to be together – it was alright, as we knew this from the very beginning…from the very first time your fingers enclosed mine…from the very first time you placed a gentle kiss on my cheek.
It was alright, though – in a peculiar way, it was. We were both thankful for the marvelous time we had been granted and knew for sure in a certain manner, we would still be walking the same road. I guess, that’s why we managed to part with a smile on our lips.
“Thank you for letting me be part of your life!”, you whispered in my ear, as I wrapped my arms around your neck for the very last time.
With every mile that the plane took me away from you, my grip around the glassy dome became stronger, as trying to hold on to what seemed to vanish now. I held on to it all the way back home, tossing it every now and then.
It was the first thing, I did, returning to my home so many miles away from you – placing this little microcosm of us there, where I could always lay eyes on it. During the first weeks, I could hardly stand looking at it, since it always caused me to pick up the phone, dialing your number – and then feeling even worse afterwards.
Evey now and then, during the years that passed, our snow globe got buried in oblivion, as I only granted it an elusive glance, when I passed it on my way to do one of those very important things that had grown to demand all my attention.
Eventually our phone calls had lessend, I stopped being excited everytime I checked my mailbox – life just went on, for both of us.
From time to time, I picked up the phone, receiving a surprising call from you, making me feel contented and smile to joggle the snow globe once again.
Years passed and we had both come to terms with our lives. Both of us happy and living the day, as we were used to. We weren’t walking the same road, any more, but it was ok, as it put me at ease, knowing “our little world” was still going on somewhere out there – even if it was without me in it.
It soothed me, knowing that you were still horse-back riding on the lanes we had passed toghether so many times.
It comforted me to know you were still remembering me, passing the old oak tree, the stream…or the lake we spent so many days at.
They say, if you once really loved someone, this person will always indwell a certain piece of your heart, even if you open it up for someone else – I guess, this applied to us.
Then the snow globe fell of the shelf.
My shoulder grazed it only lightly, as I was passing…maybe it didn’t even! Maybe it was just the wind of my hurried walk, I don’t know.
There I was…kneeling on the floor, picking up the juvenile couple from underneath the many tiny glass splinters. The sparkling water spread on my carpet, getting absorbed und strangely draining this comforting ease that had been there throughout all these years.
-----
The day you died, I started missing you again…missing “us”!
And suddenly I regret not having been in touch with you for so long…I always believed there was enough time to compose a letter or at least write an email, letting you know how thankful I am for the time we had. Thankful for the way you were with me, the way you were interested in me, my dreams…even my muddled up thoughts.
A person’s nature always is the result of the life he or she has lived….of the memories that are insider her heart…of the people she had let into her life.
So here I am…kneeling over broken glass, looking at the tiny couple holding on to each other.
Each shatter another unforgettable memorie of the way we were. An intense warmth embraces me from inside as suddenly all these memories seem to sink in again.
I can’t help but to allow a smile to take over my tears, as I remember once again: We were the lucky ones!
And even now it’s you who helps me to carry on.
“There’s so many more roads to travel….so many more smiles hidden behind your lips!” you seem to whisper.
The day you died, our snow globe broke to pieces…
The most beautiful pieces of broken glass there can possibly be.
1
Kommentare
A native speaker schrieb am 2008-03-25 05:01:10:
Your English is so full of mistakes that I strongly advise you to stick to German. I couldn't finish reading this because it was so full of errors of all kinds: spelling, grammar, vocabulary, punctuation, etc etc. Your usage is not idiomatic.
Even the best story or idea gets ruined if a writer is incapable of conveying it, and in order to convey it, you have to know what you're doing. Nothing wrong with writing this in your native language or at least having it corrected by someone who can, is there?
Don't hate the messenger...just being honest.
zOe schrieb am 2008-03-22 15:35:08:
oh my god, how sad! i hope so badly that this is not really "you"... but if it's you i'm really sorry. wonderfully written and touching! love, zoe
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