The Return
von
Blackmaid
"I can't really believe you are back home, not even now as you're sitting right here, next to me." The woman was smiling happily, her joyful heart was beating so fast and strong that she nearly supposed it could have been heared everywhere in the room.
But her husband didn't seem to notice it at all. He tried a little smile, but, honestly, he had to force himself to look happy. Of course he was relieved and glad that he was home again, safe und without any greater injuries - a lot of his companions had not been that lucky. But he felt that nothing would ever be as it was before.
He looked around the room. Pleasant, warm, really very nice. It was like a memory of a dream to him. All these things here - he didn't feel as if he belonged in here, he felt like a stranger. None of these things had any meaning to him anymore and he couldn't imagine how they could have ever meant anything to him before. And with a little pain he noticed that even his wife belonged to these things. He couldn't imagine to love her again, he couldn't even imagine he'd ever loved her. He had been away for too long. In all the endless months on the battlefield he had always wished to come home. But this here was not what he had longed for. All the misery he had experienced had left him quiet and cold - emotionless.
"Perhaps", he thought to himself, "it may all come back; perhaps I will feel like I did before. But I can't help - I'm not at home here. there is no home for me anywhere at all." He didn't want to disappoint his wife. He knew that she had gone through a lot of pain, worries and uncounted problems. So he answered her careful questions and listened to her talk, but still he remained hard as a stone.
She was not blind. She noticed the changes in him very well. It made her heart ache to see him, while she had no idea how to face this situation. He was only half the man she had known - the one to whom she had had to say good-bye nearly two years ago. In his few letters she had already made out silent changes. In all her joy to have him back again she was still afraid, and more than one time in this day she had to wipe away her tears secretly. She didn't want him to see her tears. Courage and power was what she wanted to show, and she avoided to talk of the last months. She thought it best to go on like everyday - so he wouldn't be reminded of the horrors of this war, and maybe he could soon be used to his old life. She wished it so much. And she had heard this was the best to do. So she made him tea, prepared a small meal in the evening, made a statement about the rainy whether. She even tried to explain him the new TV program they showed now on Saturdays (how silly she thought herself in that moment!). And all the while her heart was torn apart, and her throat ached from all the hidden tears.
He hoped he could go to bed early - to be alone, to escape from all this into sleep and dream. But dreaming would surely be cruel, and probably he would wake up only to escape from sleep. That was no solution, he knew it. Would there ever be a way out?
Several of his companions had chosen a radical solution, some of them already in their days of war. They had taken a shotgun to blow their heads off, ending all the present misery and the misery that might still await them. Now he found himself wondering, whether his own miserable situation was desperate enough to look for is old gun in the cellar. Maybe he should look if it was still there. Maybe tomorrow.
His eye caught a glimpse of his wife, standing in the kitchen door, her back turned to him. A shivering hand wiped over her eyes, as she felt unwatched. One moment later she had recovered, now she turned towards him again, with a glass of orange-juice and a little smile.
He watched her silently. Thin and worn-out were her features, she looked almost childlike, and maybe even a bit like the little girl of sixteen he had once fallen in love with. "Not the gun.", he said to himself. "She couldn't bear it. Not the gun."
Kommentare
lulu schrieb am 2007-07-13 18:07:51:
krasse storie!
empfehle ich weiter
LynxX schrieb am 2006-03-24 14:20:16:
I really enjoyed reading this. Really dont think it was boring. People that want more action should read stories with another subject. I almost cried a bit at the end. Well done!
boncas schrieb am 2006-02-18 12:48:23:
it is beeing good but it is a bit boring no action.......c. i´d not like to read the rest - no time
Sonja schrieb:
the story was very interesting.
pop schrieb:
Interesting??? It was boring, no action, no suspence... Too much descriptions...
Moe schrieb:
I liked your story... war can damage everything, but I'm very happy that it couldn't damage this ( whatever it is between those two )! Well done, thanks for this story
vici_klein@yahoo.de schrieb:
Eine gute Idee und eigentlich ganz gut verpackt. Ich konnte mich in die Frau und in den Mann sehr gut hineinversetzen. Ich begann sogar bei etwa der Hälfte auf ein happy end zu hoffen.
leider sind ein paar fehler darunter, z.B.:
zeile 3:Suppose kann nicht so verwendet werden. der ausdruck lautet: suppose sb./sth. to do sth. (aber nicht "to be sth., das hätte eine ein kleinwenig andere bedeutung)
oder:
zeile 9: ..."really very nice" ist zuviel. Entweder "really nice" oder "very nice" (grammatikalisch nicht falsch, aber es ist einfach so nicht gängig)
ein paar weitere kleine Fehler noch, aber die möchte ich jetz nicht aufzählen. sonst wie gesagt gut!
vici_klein@yahoo.de schrieb:
Ooops...was I supposed to write in english? I'm sorry! I hope you are german (I thought so) and you can nevertheless understand what I wrote!
english_rose17@web.de schrieb:
At first, your story seemed as if it's written by a seventh grader. The end was better. I liked it nontheless, although it's quite sad.
english@england.uk schrieb:
yo,mothers and fathers, i think this story is more boring than school,although I didn't read it.
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